I decided to share my personal pregnancy journey in hope to inspire, and help other women to not feel so alone throughout their pregnancy. This is a very raw and vulnerable post for me, but I feel it’s important to share my experience because I know there are many other women who will relate. In fact, it was through reading other peoples stories that helped me through my own challenges.
Loss, Grief & A Positive Pregnancy Test
Firstly I’ll start with saying this was a planned pregnancy. Finding out you are pregnant with your first baby is supposed to be one of the most exciting times of your life, however unfortunately just 12 hours before our pregnancy test showed those 2 precious lines, we found out we had tragically lost a close family member. The grief and sadness was so intense, I was questioning whether I should even share the news that I was pregnant with my husband straight away. Thankfully I did, and it bought some light to a very dark time in our life.
The stress and emotional trauma definitely exacerbated my pregnancy symptoms. I thought I had done all the work previously to have the dream pregnancy, how wrong I was! Stress can have a huge impact on our body. During those first 3 months I felt drained, numb and a deep sadness for our loss. I felt so guilty and ashamed that I wasn’t having the experience I thought I ‘should be’ having … happiness, excitement and joy.
Although those initial months shook me apart, trying to cope with the severe nausea, supporting my grieving husband, plus grieving myself, growing our baby, and maintaining my business – I believe everything in life happens for a reason. Looking back, this experience taught me a lot and I am grateful for all the lessons – despite how difficult they were at the time.
I’ve broken down each of the trimesters with a few extra tips to share below, plus an extensive list of all the things I did to help prepare for the birth. There will be a blog on my birth story coming soon, with more recommendations.
FIRST TRIMESTER
Symptoms: Severe nausea, vomiting, fatigue, sciatica, reflux, heartburn. I had all of these symptoms until 15 weeks. The nausea was 24/7, there was rarely a break from it. The combination of nausea and fatigue made it very hard to feel excited at the beginning of the pregnancy, it was debilitating. Especially when I had felt so well for years, it was a huge shock to the system. This really impacted on my ability to feel excited about the pregnancy (don’t get me wrong, I was extremely grateful to be pregnant). Those first 15 weeks were filled with tears, guilt, frustration and exhaustion. Not what I had planned or anticipated. The vomiting was not too severe, but most mornings after waking I would be sick.
Physical Activity: Not much at all! I would try to do a few gentle walks if I felt up to it, even just a short 15minute walk if that’s all I could manage. Apart from that I was spending a lot of time resting on the couch.
Food Aversions: I could not stomach much during this time. You can forget vegetables, fruit, soup, herbs, spices, ALL tea and coffee … not even a smoothie … FOR 15 WEEKS! As a Naturopath, I really struggled with this, as I knew the importance of consuming adequate nutrients and whole foods for my growing baby. I felt like I was already failing. I would generally find one food I could tolerate, and eat it for lunch and dinner ongoing until I could no longer stomach it. I never ate McDonalds or fast food restaurants, but I did go through a phase of takeaway Thai Red Curry (I was able to add in a few extra veggies here, to mask them with the sauce!), BBQ chicken, mayo & lettuce wraps, pasta or pizza from the local Italian Restaurant. My husband thought it was hilarious, I did not … I felt extremely guilty for not eating a ‘healthy diet’, I am a Naturopath, I should be eating healthy right? I had no choice … I could not stomach anything healthy, I tried, and boy did I suffer from it.
Food Cravings: Cheese, bread, Vegemite and cheese on toast, chips & meat pies (something I have not eaten or wanted for YEARS!!). Breakfast was probably my healthiest meal of the day (in comparison to my other meals), which was muesli, BioDynamic yoghurt, hemp seeds, chia seeds and berries.
Healthier Options That I was Able To Eat:
- Eggs on Toast
- Homemade buckwheat bread, this gave me a break from the wheat-based breads and was rich in nutrients. I was also able to grate some carrot or zucchini into the mix.
- Adding capsicum, broccoli and mushrooms to my curry, which masked the vegetables
- Homemade pizzas, using Mountain Bread wraps, zucchini, mushrooms and capsicum, shredded chicken and cheese.
Tips For Morning Sickness
- Eat smaller meals, frequently. I ate every 2 hours which seemed to make a bit of a difference.
- Ginger – Tea is great, but if you are like me and couldn’t stomach hot drinks, I steeped ginger tea bags in cold water. Or I would make a ‘healthier’ fizzy drink with 1/4 glass ginger beer, soda water and ice.
- Vitamin B6 – Always check with a health practitioner first.
- There are specific herbs that can help with nausea, but I personally could not keep any tablet or liquid down. See your naturopath for herbs that may help you.
- Keep snacks next to your bed at night, when your blood sugar levels drop it can flare up nausea. Dry crackers seem to be well tolerated.
- Acupuncture can be very beneficial. I had not tried this myself at the time, I really wish I had of though! Many other women have told me how much it helped them.
All I can say to the pregnant mamas who are currently in the depths of nausea right now, is HANG IN THERE! Whilst it can feel like your in a never ending hole of suffering, it will eventually pass. You will enjoy food again, and you will regain your life and happiness! Take one day at a time, reach out to close friends who you feel comfortable with and won’t judge you.
Deep down, beyond the suffering and tiredness – there is still immense joy to be pregnant. But I want you to know, it’s OK if you don’t enjoy all that comes with pregnancy at times. Pregnancy can be hard, on your mind, emotions and body. Be gentle, forgive yourself, and let go of all expectations of what you think it should be. This is the first taste of your journey into motherhood.
SECOND TRIMESTER
It was the best feeling in the world to wake up, and not have to run to the toilet bowl after 15 weeks! Everyone spoke about the second trimester being the best. I’ll be honest, I never really felt my energy levels lift again until about 24 weeks. I experienced leg cramps throughout the night (ouch they hurt!). If I had been wearing any type of shoe that had a heel, even a sandal with a slight heel, I was guaranteed to wake up with cramps throughout the night.
Insomnia started around 20 weeks, and continued almost until the end of the pregnancy. This naturally didn’t help my energy levels, so afternoon naps became quite common when it was possible. I also reduced my work days to help conserve my energy.
Symptoms: Leg cramps at night, insomnia (thanks to the surge of hormones).
Food Aversions: All seafood!
Food Cravings: Yoghurt, pumpkin seeds and berries combined. I couldn’t get enough of them! I love Jalna BioDynamic Yogurt, it’s great for digestion and has no added sugar. One of the weirdest cravings I had, was celery leaves and cheese on crackers … I have no idea where this came from! Lucky we had celery growing in the garden so I had an abundance of it available.
Physical Activity: By 15 weeks, I was able to go back to the gym to do a very gentle workout. This included the bike or treadmill, plus light weights for upper back and arm strength. I also did a lot of squats (great to help with birth & carrying the increased weight). I can’t stress enough how important it is to stay in tune with your body, and not push yourself because you’re afraid of weight gain. Some weeks I did nothing, other weeks I managed a few walks & the gym if I felt well enough. I also loved prenatal yoga, it was so supportive for my body as my bump grew! It helped to relieve aches and pains and soothed my nervous system, I highly recommend this.
Pregnancy is not a time to push yourself, or achieve weight goals. It’s about maintaining strength and wellness to support your body and baby.
Pregnancy Care: Chiropractic treatments monthly, and pregnancy massages.
Tips for Leg Cramps
I found a good quality magnesium cream to apply topically, and also took a calcium/magnesium supplement before bed. Stretching and avoiding any type of heel also made a big difference. Epsom salts baths a few times a week (in a warm bath), and massaging my calves was very soothing. Please check with a qualified health practitioner before taking supplements.
THIRD TRIMESTER
By 28 weeks I had a decent sized bump growing. I was actually feeling really good energy-wise up until about 34 weeks, most likely because I made a conscious effort to slow down with work, and diving deeper into my little pregnancy bubble of self-care. I didn’t feel motivated to do much at all, not even to read a book (aside from my birth books). I really focused on self-care, long baths, nourishing meals, slow walks and movies. I did all I could to get my body in the best possible space for the huge changes we were about to embark on.
Symptoms: Swollen feet and ankles, some back pain due to the pressure from my belly! This was helped with regular chiropractic treatments, massage, not standing for long periods, yoga and a lot of stretching.
Food Cravings & Aversions: The same as the second trimester.
Physical Activity: From about 30 weeks I really started to slow down as my body was tired and heavy. The third trimester was focusing around preparing my body for birth, and supporting all the changes it was experiencing. I put my gym membership on hold because I didn’t have the energy to go anymore. I purely did walking anywhere from 10 minutes – 45 minutes depending on how I felt, prenatal yoga and squats using my body weight.
Pregnancy Care: Weekly to fortnightly chiropractic treatments, regular pregnancy massage. From 35 weeks I commenced weekly acupuncture treatments.
PREPARING FOR BIRTH
For me personally, investing in regular treatments and taking the time to support my body for the upcoming birth was non-negotiable. I really feel that taking the time to look after myself, allowed me to make it to the end of the pregnancy feeling reasonably comfortable, this also helped to get my body in the best possible state for the birth & recovery.
I can’t express enough how important it is to educate yourself as much as possible throughout the pregnancy. I found there is a great deal of negativity and fear based around child birth, I was determined to avoid this as much as possible. Ladies, please learn how the hormonal system works throughout labour, know the physical changes that occur during each stage, know your options (and side effects) of pain relief options. I discuss more tools, books and tips in My Birth Story (coming soon). For now, here is a list of all the things I focused on for the birth preparation:
- Fortnightly Chiropractic Treatments: To help support my back, pelvis and overall alignment.
- Pregnancy Massage: To relive back pain, support the nervous system and reduce stress
- Acupuncture: Weekly visits from 35 weeks, to ripen the cervix, support the nervous system and balance hormones. The acupuncturist I visited (listed below) also incorporated energy work into her treatments, so it helped to address any emotional blockages I had at the time.
- Epi-No: This is an inflatable ballon to enhance pelvic floor muscles, and gently begin to stretch the perineum in preparation for birth. It can help to prevent tearing and prolapse.
- Herbal Medicine: This is individualised for each person so I won’t list what my herbal tonic included, but it did address partus-prep (uterine tonic) and nourish my nervous system and adrenals.
- Rest & Sleep: I was still experiencing quite regular insomnia, so I tried to ensure I was home in the afternoons to have a nap or at least rest on the lounge.
- Birth Affirmations: I had these stuck all over my house! Positive affirmations over time helps to create an empowering and positive mindset towards birth. This is particularly beneficial if you feel a lot of fear.
- Meal Prep: I spent a lot of time in the last month preparing meals, soups, bliss balls, and stews that would nourish my body the first few weeks post-birth. Our freezer was full by the end, and it made a huge difference in those first few weeks where we were too tired to cook anything. I made electrolyte ice cubes to hydrate me during labour, ask your health practitioner for a good quality electrolyte supplement that doesn’t include artificial sweeteners or colourings.
- Extra Support Post-Birth: We are lucky enough in the Illawarra to have a Doula who provides 6 weeks postpartum care (find out more about Briony’s services at thenestingplace.com.au). As we don’t have family close by, having the extra care and support each week made a huge difference to my recovery and wellbeing initially. I also chose to hire a cleaner, for fortnightly visits during the first few months to help reduce my workload. Looking after a newborn is a huge role in itself, let alone worrying about cleaning bathrooms etc. If this is an option financially, I strongly recommend it (particularly as you need to focus on healing during this time).
- Birth Classes: My husband and I attended a weekend CalmBirth course, which I highly recommend to everyone! This provides fantastic education resources, addresses each stage of labour in great detail and tools to support you. It’s an extremely empowering course, no matter how your birth turns out. The partners all found it very helpful for their role during the birth
I hope my personal story has helped you, particularly if you’re struggling with severe morning sickness. Hang in there, although it feels like it will never end and you can’t get through another day … you can and you will. Pregnancy and motherhood can crack you and break you open on so many levels. But it’s also the most incredible journey of growth and trust. Too all the pregnant mamas, you are doing an amazing job!
Suzie xx
Photography By: The Nesting Place
Please note, this post is based on my personal experience and health requirements. Always consult a qualified Naturopath or Nutritionists if you have specific health concerns.